Country Dogs and Creek Indians

We suffered a deluge last week—five inches of rain in two days as recorded by the rain gage attached to the flagpole in my front yard (from which proudly wave Old Glory and the Marine Corps Flag). This is a mountainous country, and there are many streams, creeks and rivers. To get from our cabin to Blue Ridge we have to cross a couple of creeks and one river, and they were running full, fast and muddy because of the rain. I understand why many people think the phrase “God willing and the creeks don’t rise” refers to flood waters. I certainly did.

However, I was told recently that the correct phrase is “God willing and the Creek don’t rise.” The Creek in this case refers to a Southeastern Indian tribe that battled with the early settlers. Davy Crockett and Andrews Jackson fought the Creek Indians in the Red Stick War. You’d know that if you are old enough and watched Davy Crockett on the Walt Disney Show in the early 1960s.

There is some controversy among etymologists over the origin of the phrase. If it’s true that the phrase actually refers to the Creek Indians that makes it even cooler in my estimation. While I consider myself a seeker of the unvarnished truth, in the case I’m going to make an exception. I like the Indian tribe derivation of the phrase so much that I’m going to believe it is true no matter what.

Now on to a totally untreated subject—country dogs. If you have dreams of living in the country, then you need to know about country dogs.

Real country men like their dogs. When I say real country men, I’m talking about men who were born and raised in the country—men with rusting cars and broke down washing machines and riding lawnmowers in their yards; men who hunt and make deer sausage, have Skoal rings on the back pockets of their jeans and wear work boots; men who watch NASCAR, drive four-wheel drive pickup trucks with NRA stickers in the window, wear faded baseball caps that are frayed from use and hate cats.

You won’t catch real country men with dogs like Shiatzus, Pugs or Chihuahuas. Real country men only own dogs that are large, scary and loud. I don’t know much about dog breeds, but I’m told some of the dogs owned by real country men are recognizable breeds. If I had to guess, I would think they can be found in dog books in the sections devoted to mean, vicious and dangerous dogs. Others seem to be a cross between the Canine genus and other creatures like wolves, hyenas and the hounds of hell. It’s the long, yellow, dripping canine incisors that give them away.

I know this because I have worked the annual Fannin County rabies clinic for the last two years. This is an event where dog owners can get a low cost rabies shot for their dogs. It brings out the dog owners who live in lonely rural homesteads and down isolated gravel roads.

Some of the dogs that you encounter at the rabies clinic are absolutely frightening. When you see a dog in a cage built from reinforced half-inch rebar you know it’s not to be messed with. If you try to pet one of these dogs the odds are that you're going to be missing a few finger or your arm. When these dogs look at you it’s obvious they are calculating how much food value you represent. They’re dogs that use two by fours as chew toys and are capable of opening cans of dog food without help.

It seems that real country men are not content to own one or two of these dogs. From what I can tell they’re not happy unless they own a pack of them. They’re not house dogs. They’re yard dogs which at a minimum means they are tethered with a thick anchor chain connected a thick iron stake pounded into the ground. They’re outside all night keeping the property safe.

The common characteristic of these dogs is that they bark and howl with voices that carry over three mountain ridges. If you move to the country be prepared for the fact that on any given night, often multiple times a night, all the dogs in a several mile radius will start barking and howling. It begins with one set of dogs and then the whole choir starts in. I figure that some nighttime critter like a bear, deer or bobcat sets them off.

It’s something you just going to have to get used to when you live in the country. There’s nothing you can do about it. If you call the local sheriff’s department and complain about the noise you’ll be placed on the suspected pinko communist watch list. If you say something to your neighbor about the barking he’ll look at you like you’re some citified sissy and never talk to you again.

The good thing is that when you live in the country your neighbors are not right next door so the barking dogs are usually some distance from you. After a while you get used to the noise. Over time you feel comforted by the thought that the nighttime howling is scaring away animals that are even scarier than the dogs doing the howling.

I think the reason that real country men like country dogs is because they are tough, macho companions instead of prissy pampered pets. They can stay outdoors in the rain and the snow. They forage for themselves when bored or hungry by catching varmits like moles and field mice and perhaps the occasional small child. They don’t mind laying down in the dirt or drinking water from a creek. They stay at your side all day when you’re working outside except for occasional forays to chase a squirrel or follow up on some smell that trails off into the wood line.

So this is my homage to country dogs and my caution to those who aspire to live in the country.